Possum bumped into someone as he came through the door at Axe’s True Blue American Cafe & Barber Shoppe.
“Pardon me,” he said.
“Was that Matt Bevin?” Albino Alice the barber asked.
“No, why?” Possum asked.
“Well, he was handin’ out pardons like they was goin’ outta style, especially to child rapists and murderers,” Alice said. “Thought maybe you had a past we didn’t know about.”
“That’s about as funny as a screen door in a submarine,” Possum said. “I ain’t gonna defend him on that. But he done a lotta good things.”
“I ain’t gonna git into no political arguments today,” Axe said. “But him and Trump both gotta bad case of foot in mouth disease.”
“You know,” Bubba said. “It’s a shame that murders and child rapists can git pardoned. But there’s good folks out that who got in trouble when they was young and can’t git a decent job ‘cause they gotta record. They should set up a committee to check ‘em out and recommend the good ‘uns for pardons. That would help more people git into good jobs.”
“That makes too much sense fer Frankfort or Warshington,” Axe said. “It don’t let the folks with money have a say.”
“Let’s impeach Nancy Pelosi,” Axe said. “Lock her up.”
“We done impeached your lord and savior,” Alice said.
“It’s a waste of time and money,” Bubba said. “Ol’ Mitch is jist gonna dismiss it. Everthang is just politics these days.”
“Yeah,” Axe said. “If it ain’t yer party, it’s evil. If it’s your party, it’s sacred. I miss the times when people put the country ahead of politics.”
“And folks gonna believe the worst about folks on the other side, even if it ain’t true,” Bubba said.
“It’s them dang Russian hackers,” Alice said. “They’re helpin’ Trump.”
“You got that wrong,” Possum said. “They helpin’ Hillary.”
“Hillary ain’t runnin’!,” Alice said.
“Lord help us,” Axe said. “Another year of this.”
“At least,” Bubba said.
Keith Lawrence, 270-691-7301, firstname.lastname@example.org