“Hey, Possum,” Albino Alice the barber said when he came in the door at Axe’s True Blue American Cafe & Barber Shoppe, “did you pay more taxes last year than yer president?”
“Don’t believe that fake news ‘bout him payin’ only $750 in federal taxes,” Possum said. “He said he paid millions. Who you
gonna believe him or that
New York Times?”
Axe sighed, “Alice, what you think ‘bout the $70,000 he claims he spent a year on haircuts?”
“I’d cut that mess fer free,” she said. “He should ask fer his money back. That cut is a mess.”
“Well, he sure mopped the floor with ol’ Sleepy Joe the other night in that there debate,” Possum said. “You can’t deny that.”
“Somebody shoulda mopped the floor after that mess,” Bubba said. “They shoulda warned parents to put the kids to bed early. That wasn’t fit fer little ears to hear.”
“I didn’t hear nobody say no bad words,” Possum said.
“You couldn’t hear nobody say nothin’ with Trump talkin’ over everbody else,” Alice said. “Whatever happened to common courtesy?”
“He was jist tryin’ to talk over Lyin’ Joe’s lies,” Possum said. “He done a superb job.”
“I done voted,” Axe said. “Wanted to go ahead and git it over with in case sumpin’ happens to me. I wish I could stop them robocalls though. I’m tard of them things.”
“This COVID thing is gettin’ worse instead of better,” Bubba said. “We been havin’ more cases lately than we had earlier.”
“It’ll all be gone once the ‘lection is over,” Possum said. “It’s jist a Dumbocrat plot to beat Trump, which they ain’t gonna do.”
“So, 200,000 people jist up and died to try to beat Trump?” Alice asked.
“Them people all died of sumpin’ else and the Dumbocrats called it COVID,” Possum said.
‘They need to find a cure fer stupid before they work on one fer COVID,” Alice said. “I think you got a terminal case.”
Keith Lawrence, 270-691-7301, firstname.lastname@example.org